Well this has been quite the week....one for the record books I would say! Who knew I'd be able to have such a wide range of experience all in just a matter of days.

It began with the news that I had been chosen as one of the seven to audition for the privilege of being the opening speaker at Caroline Myss' event on the 31st! WOWEE! What an honor!

Monday held a one-on-one session with a Shaman from Peru, and later that afternoon the start of the first dance class I can ever remember taking. Mom and I are trying our hand (well, our feet really) at clogging. So far so good!

The next day I was in the office of the ENT oncologist who had originally diagnosed the cancer. Sitting in the waiting room turned out to be a chance to revisit all the emotions of so many months ago. And then, out of the blue, I crossed paths with a friend I had lost contact with and whom I haven't seen for about 6 years.

Yesterday found me in front of a group of 30+, mostly teenagers, who had arrived from a private, conservative Christian school to engage in a conversation about religious beliefs. This encounter deserves a sidenote! For most of my life, I have avoided any conversation about religion because frankly, I didn't know what I believed and the whole thing made me uncomfortable. More recently, however, if I've avoided it it's because of a few experiences with people who have judged me harshly for believing what I believe. So standing in front of a room like this left me feeling as if I had just voluntarily lined up for a firing squad. Of course, this was not the case, but our fears and reactions are not always rational, now are they? It turned out to be a wonderful experience, with an exchange of questions and personal answers between and amongst all. The group that organized the gathering is doing so as a way to expose the ones they work with to viewpoints other than their own. What a great idea! So many of us say we want peace in the world, and then spend most of our time with people who think just like we do. That much sought after "peace" will continue to be elusive until we can all actually be in the same room and engage in conversation without the need to make one right and another wrong. Of course it is not something that will happen overnight, but it is a process that I believe in. 

And finally, this week will end with a big bang....a.k.a. "my 7 minutes". Preparing for the Audition Event has brought many gifts...the biggest of which is remembering to breathe! I don't feel in competition with the other 6 speakers. I know my goal is to show up and be myself, to do what I do, and let the outcome take care of itself. In preparation though, I've had to do more things that have challenged me: have good photos taken and write a bio for the event advertisement. As strange as it may sound, those two tasks s t r e t c h e d me more than I can express!

As if it wasn't obvious before, I'm certain now that this path of growing into vulnerability and transparency will always be accompanied by the constant companion of fear. I guess that's why we often feel such a strong desire to hide ourselves and stay with what feels familiar because fear, when it rises, is so uncomfortable! And yet, I also choose to see it as simply a reminder to .......yes.......BREATHE......and just keep moving.
 

In love and light,
Lorena

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